ACAI DIET END OF WEEK ONE

OMGoodness!!!!  My weight, as people know, has been an issue for a while now.  I have therefore decided to give the Acai Diet a try and am at the end of week one with amazing results.

I take 2 Acai capsules per day along with 2 colon cleansing tablets per day and I have, this week, lost an incredible 5lbs.  I did walk twice for 1 hour each time and have did at least half an hour on Just Dance on the Wii Fit also this week but the results are still incredible.

I researched this very well prior to ordering my tablets and was very sceptical but these tablets do exactly what they say on the box.  They manage to curb your appetite an example being tonight when I ate pasta and garlic bread.  I had given myself a medium portion but could only eat half before feeling completely full.  Given that I have only had one weetabix and a cuppa soup today that is incredible.

I also exercised for 40 minutes today on the Wii Just Dance 2 which burns around 300 calories.

I will keep a weekly diary on how my weight loss is going but so far so good.  Word of caution though - do not take them at night as they will keep you awake.  I feel like a whippet during the day due to the energy which the Acai give you.  Truly an amazing diet - so far!!!!!



OVERWEIGHT

My weight is such a major issue just now.  It is fluctuating constantly and it is not helping my mood.

I am trying my hardest to keep active, moving and exercise as hard as I possibly can but I just cannot seem to keep the weight going down.  It is kinda like bipolar my weight - it bounces from one extreme to the other!!! 

I cannot blame it on medication as I am off the mood stabiliser - which is not helping my mood nor my weight!  I have also lowered my anti depressant by 75mg which is not helping either!  I see my psychiatrist on Thursday so will have to wait and see what he says.

I guess all I can keep doing just now is keep the motivation of exercising up and do it EVERY day and also keep an eye on what I am eating and drinking - I reckon that 2 bottles of wine at the weekend were definitely not good when I am dieting!

FREEDOM



Okay, so I am prone to doing things differently at times that I admit but this latest idea really has cheered me up and I am only "into" day one!

I felt there was too much going on in my daily life and felt a real urge to step away from people both in the flesh and online and have, quite simply, ME TIME!!!  I have even deactivated my Facebook Account (shock, horror - to some people it really is SHOCK, HORROR).  I will of course come back to Facebook but only when I feel like it.

I do not have the temptation to sit at my computer and watch as status's are updated or even to update my own status.  My house is always clean but having the extra time on my hands has left my main bathroom (the first room I tackled) absolutely gleaming - see what you can do without being attached to Facebook.

Unfortunately some people are taking it very personally that I have chosen not to communicate at present but hey, that aint my fault.  I do not have to justify my life to anyone. 

So today I enjoyed a slow walk in the sunshine due to my ankle hurting and a lovely Thai lunch with a wonderful friend.  I really enjoyed being FREE today !!!!

THE BIG VOICE OF THE LITTLE PEOPLE IS UNFAIRPAK

To have been given a chance to write an article for the Times regarding Farepak is something I would never have dreamed of.  However, that is exactly what happened and here is the finished, printed, published product.

Suzy Hall


February 17 2011 12:01AM

On October 13, 2006, some 123,000 people had Christmas ripped from their hands when Farepak went into administration, taking with it £40 million of savers’ money. I was one of them. My family lost £1,000, but others fared even worse.



But at long last, all of us who, month after month, deposited our money with the Christmas hamper company might have something to celebrate. This week, the Insolvency Service began formal disqualification proceedings against nine former Farepak directors. These people are not fit to run a company; they deserve to be struck off.



The campaign group Unfairpak has fought continuously to have the directors brought to account for their incompetent, greedy, selfish and irresponsible actions. I firmly believe that the directors did not expect for one second that there would be an uprising of savers calling for justice. But now we can say that the voices of the “little people” have made a difference.



On August 23, 2006, the shares of European Home Retail, the parent company of Farepak, were suspended. Despite this obvious sign that the company was in serious trouble, the Farepak directors continued to take customers’ money — and ultimately the Christmases of thousands of children. Knowing that some of the directors must have been aware that Farepak was facing liquidation makes us savers feel even more that we were regarded with utter contempt by them.



During the weeks after the collapse, while Farepak savers were worrying about how we were going to pay for our families’ presents, we were subjected to images on TV and in the papers of the directors leaving their million-pound homes, even jetting off on luxury holidays. But the portrayal of savers as simply “poor people” or “financially illiterate” was wrong. Farepak savers were prudent. They planned ahead in order to avoid debts at Christmas. Despite this prudence, at the moment we are to get back no more than 15p for every £1 lost, although we hope that figure will rise.



The outcry over politicians’ expenses and bankers’ bonuses shows that society is no longer willing to sit back and let the “fat cats” get away with it any more. We are becoming a classless, less deferential society and the Farepak fightback is another example of how the voices of the “little people” will be heard. If any good can come from the debacle, this could be it. This week a loud message has been sent: no one is above the law and, though it may take time, justice will prevail.



Suzy Hall is national campaign co-ordinator of Unfairpak

On the up again? Perhaps not!!!!

I am feeling all sorts of emotions right now and I don't like it.  I detest when I am basically "all over the place" when it comes to my mind.

With the Grand Canyon trip almost at £1,000 right now, I feel like I should be happy and yes I am but at the same time, I am not.  I feel very sad that Cheryl dropped out.  I really don't feel that it is appropriate to go into the in's and outs of why we are doing it separately (although not sure if Cheryl is even doing it now) here on a blog for all to see.  I guess what I can say is we had a huge difference of opinions which made us both split down the middle.  Now some of my friends say "move on, forget about her............." that is not quite so easy to do.  Other people say "what was your relationship with her, think about it................"!  It is difficult when friends believe they are helping you by pointing out things that THEY expect you to see and it makes the grieving process (I am at the end of a relationship and should be allowed to grieve) all the more difficult.

Also my medication had to be lowered - my mood stabiliser due to the fact that when I started taking the 600mg on top of all the other medication, I was effectively comatosed during the night.  Not good at all when I am a single parent with children to look after.  My psychiatrist now wants to meet me to discuss the lowering of my anti depressant, which I am all for as the dosage I am on should apparently knock out a horse and it aint doing that too me!  Apparently if they lower the anti depressant it helps with the mood stabiliser which I would say is the most important thing considering my mood is mainly "ups".  I think that is why I am finding it so hard being depressed at present as my depressive episodes are very, very, very few and I am not used to it at all.  The last time I had SEVERE depression was probably back about 9 years ago now and it lasted a damn long time.

My weight has been a huge issue also.  I had went down to just under 11 stone then in the space of 6 weeks had shot up back over 12 stone.  My medication has a lot to answer for that also.  It is not the medication that makes you put on weight but the cravings that the medication gives you.  I am however thankful to point out that due to walking with Michelle this week in training for the Grand Canyon trek that I have lost 2lbs.  I am also trying very hard to watch what I eat.

I am very tearful also and the slightest thing can set me off.  This truly is a side of bi-polar that I do not like in the slightest.  So, having lowered my Valporate by 300mg we shall see what happens.  The only difference I have noticed so far is I am not comatosed every single night and during the day I am feeling a little more anxious and irritated. 

Oh the joys of mental health eh!

A Sign Was Sent

There comes a time in life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it. You surround yourself with people who make you laugh, forget the bad, and focus on the good. So, love the people who treat you right. Pray for the ones who don't. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Falling down is part of LIFE...Getting back up is LIVING.........Re-post if you agree; I just did xx

Still not feeling wonderful

I was hoping by now that my mood would have lifted a little but unfortunately due to various factors over the past few days, it has kind of sunk a bit lower.

I am grouchy, miserable, tearful and just generally feeling socially disoriented.  It is at times like this that I totally and utterly despise bi-polar, reach for my meds which give me no solace whatsoever.  These are the times my head leans heavily into my hands, my hair is constantly swept back off my face and the only safe place for me is to go and lie down in bed and hide.

How must the kids feel?  They must have an understanding as even although I hide my feelings behind my "mask" I am a different person outwardly.  Right now they are very happy playing Super Mario Galaxy as they have opened a new world.  They were also delighted with dinner - sausage roll (from Greggs) beans and chip shop chips oh and a Belgian bun to finish off.  Not exactly a healthy dinner, is it?

Whilst they play, I sit here in the dark with my huge mug of coffee sitting beside me whilst I type away.  My caffeine intake I feel is utterly incredulous and more than likely paves the way to my "not sleeping at night" especially considering my GP states that the tablets I am on should "knock out a horse"!!  Believe me, I do not have four legs, a mane and a tail!

I am in "No Man's Land" right now.  It is a strange place to be.  I am sure other people have experienced this "land".  For me I am alone yet I can hear and see the children albeit muffled.  I can choose to go back towards the light or carry on forwards to the dark.  I may venture down towards the dark a little but there is something stupendous within me that always and I really mean ALWAYS, brings me back from the brink of falling completely into the dark hole.  Is it because I have already experienced "hell" many years ago and made it home safely?  Who knows, the most important thing is that I do not go there again.

I really could do with a cigarette right now.  I have none and have not had any in over 3 weeks now.  It is time to say "tripe, tripe, tripe" and hey, it has worked.  I absolutely cannot stand the smell of tripe so everytime I crave a cigarette, I think of the smell of tripe - disgusting!  I am using my inhalator right now (which I have not used in a while) as my craving is powerful!  I will not buckle though, no way.

I have a lot going on right now so it is completely understandable that I am a little over the place so to speak.  However, I have to be honest and say that there is someone who has hurt me so badly and I really did not think that person could say such vile things but obviously I was wrong.  I have a lot to learn about "friendships" even although I am 40 now!

I feel like crap!!!!

Whey hey, I feel like crap.  Bipolar brain working overtime the past few days and boy does it make me exhausted, high, crap feelings, basically shite!

I am feeling so bad about my soul mates mother right now nothing can leave my mind.  Not him, nor his mother, nor the rest of the family.

Try imagine lying in bed at night with your mind going ten to the dozen and then multiply that by 100 - that is how I feel right now!

I can't do anything - I don't want to phone him because the situation is awkward.  I have text him and to be fair he has text back saying "he needs to concentrate on his mother" and I know that but it don't make me feel like not feeling shit.

I wish I could wave a magic wand and all this shit will disappear but it won't because I have no magic wand to wave :o(

I guess right now the best thing I can do is let him get on with it in his own way.  There is nothing else I can do - nothing.  That stinks especially, when like me, you are a "do-er".

Best thing for me tonight - bed!!!

Goodnight everyone and remember just how precious life actually is!